Tuesday, May 21, 2013

My Girls

Sadie's cry in her sleep just sounded like a peacock. My sister-in-law would be scared. You know who you are.

I asked Sadie if she tooted. She answered, "No. Daddy's pooped." 

Me: Sadie, did you have a good nap?
Sadie: Elbow. 

She is blaming people for her stinky smells and making no sense. She is obviously going to take after Carter.

I started watching Granite Flats with Avery. The other day, there was a nerdy guy who was flirting with a girl in the show. Avery said, "I think he's trying to get her to like him. I don't think she will do it, even in the end." I asked why not. "Because he's too weird." Then today, she said, "Now there are two guys who like that girl." I asked how she could tell. "Because he's looking at her like she is pretty."

I think she is pretty observant for a six-year-old!

Another observation she made about the show: It's so weird that the show always ends right at the best part, and it just makes it so I can't wait to start the next one! 

That's how they always hook you...

I hope Bill looks at me like I am pretty.

Elbow.

Monday, May 13, 2013

Mother's Day

Reasons why I totally deserved what I got on Mother's Day, which was fighting kids and being late to church:

1. I just did Avery's half birthday celebration at school, three months late.
2. For her birthday at school, she got a no homework pass, which I realized was useless because she hardly ever does her homework in the first place.
3. I swore at Carter during his haircut tonight.
4. I forgot to feed Sadie lunch and grabbed a handful of snacks when we had to go somewhere today.
5. I made Avery cry. Lots of times. 
6. Some of those times I then yelled at her for crying. 
7. I didn't blink when Sadie ate food she found under the table on the floor I hadn't slept for over a day.
Well, I probably blinked because I blink a lot because of my contacts.
8. It has been six weeks since I gave any of my kids a piano lesson, nine since I gave Avery one.
9. I never made Bill a birthday cake, and his birthday was three weeks ago. What kind of mom doesn't teach her kids that daddy's birthday is important?
10. My kids had to get school clothes out of the dirty clothes because I am about ten loads of laundry behind where I should be to keep my kids from going naked.
11. I didn't call my mom for Mother's Day until today because I didn't pay attention to the time, and it is two hours later where she lives.
12. I still feel like swearing twenty minutes after Carter's haircut. And the clippers are still on the counter with hair all over them, and I am waiting for Bill to notice and put them away.

Bill did make me cinnamon roll pancakes, even if he had to break the Sabbath because he didn't know we were out of eggs more than two-thirds of the way into cooking. 

I guess you have to break a few Sabbaths to get some eggs.

I realize that wasn't really funny. It really is a special day. Don't go buy eggs on Sunday. Unless you are making me a treat. 

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

See Ducks?

A typical conversation with Carter ends with Bill or me telling him that his questions don't make sense or that we can't quantify things the way he thinks we can.

Bill: Carter, you will love this book.
Carter: How much will I love it?
Bill: A lot.
Carter: But HOW much?
Bill: Um...

Me: You need to take a shower. You stink.
Carter: How stinky am I?
Me: Very stinky.
Carter: But HOW stinky?
Me: Um...

I wish I had kept track of his questions over the last few days, but he does it so often, they don't stick with me anymore.

I spent the day at the dentist with the kids. Preston has a cavity, Avery has a crooked tooth and might have to have a baby tooth pulled, and Carter has a tooth that is dissolving before the root is dissolving. And Sadie just went crazy there, especially the second hour when she should have been waking up from a two-hour nap that she completely missed.

Avery found the scrapbook my mom made for me when I was little. These are her comments.

"You were cute." (It's a matter of opinion.)
"You were chubby." (I really was.)
"You could draw really good." (I really couldn't.)
"Aunt Heather was a cute baby." (She really was.)
"You had a lot of certificates." (She was awed, even though they weren't all for important things.)
"You got a lot of A's on your report cards. And you got a B in conduct!" (The teachers' comments were always about how I talked too much no matter who they had me sitting by.)
"Your hair looks crazy in a lot of pictures." (It really did. Neither my mom or I knew how to do hair. No offense, Mom.)
"Your glasses when you were little were huge! Why didn't you get cute glasses like I did?" (Neither my mom or I knew how to pick out cute glasses. Again, no offense, Mom.)

When I got home from taking the kids to school one morning, Sadie was staring out in the field next to our house as I got her out of the car. I asked her what she was looking at, and she said, "Duck. Quack quack." There were no ducks, but there were some pheasants. She watched them until they were out of sight. Now, every morning, she asks, "Ducks, mommy? See ducks?"





Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Sick Sadie

Sadie is sick today with a super high fever. She keeps crying, and she mostly just wants me to hold her. She keeps saying, with a sob, "I need Daddy!"

She sat with me and watched a movie, Treasure Buddies. She loved it the whole time. She kept getting excited and talking about the puppies and the monkey. But one part made her cry. When the camel spit all over the bad guy's face. She was so upset about it!

And now she is screaming in her crib. Short nap.