Thursday, December 18, 2014

Glow Sticks Light Up the Night

One of the funniest things I have a heard a kid apologize for without being prompted: "I'm sorry for eating the gwoh stick." 

Overheard: "No, no! We don't tug at people's bum cracks!"

Sadie: No way! ...Is that funny? Or is it funny when I say, "No way, Hoo-say"? Which one is funny?

Me: (to Sadie) Did you know it's only three days until Christmas?
Sadie's Dinosaur: Oh, I didn't know that you could yodel. And by the way, there's some poop on my bum.  (The dinosaur lied. I can't yodel, and his dinosaur bum was clean.)

I overheard a kid singing "Joel the Lump of Coal" by the Killers and, supposedly, Jimmy Kimmel. Then the kid said, "Is Joel even a name? I've never heard of it before in my life." We all stared at him. Then Bill said, "Um...your UNCLE Joel?" "Oh yeah..." said the kid, looking sheepish. It's not even the kid who usually spaces out.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

My Favorite Color

I told Sadie about how I accidentally cut myself. She told me a little story. "One time, I wasn't being carefoh enough with a knife, and I cut mysehf, and I was bweeding, and that was four years ago." (She just barely turned three.) 

Sadie: Is this wrapping paper sparkowee? Oh, it is sparkowee? I wuv it! Sparkowee is MY favorite cowor! 

Sadie begins every single prayer (at any time of day and for any reason) for the past few months the exact same way. "Heavenwy Father, we thank thee for this day. We ask that we can say the prayer this night and that we can be calm and safe." She continues with all kinds of random things that you would expect a two-year-old, now three-year-old to say. She then proceeds to be neither calm or safe. She walks around with blankets on her head next to the top of the stairs, being completely unsafe and making me completely un-calm. She attacks my injured arm. She throws tantrums. She throws all her hardest toys at me. She screams for hours because she forgot to tell someone "Merry Christmas" or because she didn't go potty at someone else's house. She hits me in the eyes so many times that it really is a miracle that my eyes have been safe from her so far. She cries because I give her a sippy cup instead of a big girl cup. She cries because I give her a big girl cup instead of a sippy cup. She laughs uncontrollably about weird things. (I'm not admitting which parent she gets that from.) Somehow, we end the day being relatively safe, and we do say the prayer this night. The calm part may not get answered the way I hope, but it works out in the end. And if it doesn't, there's always chocolate that can be found at my house.

Me: You have the cutest little face!
Sadie: You have a BIG face. You have the weirdest face in the hoe white worohd.

I overheard Sadie singing Christmas songs to herself. "Si-went night, Hoe-wee Ghost..."

Sadie drew a picture for someone. She explained her scribbles to me. "This is the Christmas tree. This is a heart. This is you, and this is your bwood. And this is your more bwood on your finger from not being carefoh. And this is another mommy, and this is another bwood...."