I don't have one best friend, but we moved frequently as I was growing up, and we have moved a few times since we got married. Because of the many relocations, I had many times that I had to start over and make all new friends. I am glad that I am not introverted because it would have been even harder for me to make friends. I usually had a lot of friends wherever I lived, and I am grateful for that.
One thing I did notice, in my many attempts to make new friends, was that it was always harder to be friends with people who already had a "best friend". They usually didn't feel like they needed more friends, and they rarely made efforts to befriend new people. I have seen this situation occur at every stage of life. I also felt more intimidated trying to befriend people when I knew they already had a best friend. I knew I wouldn't be their very best friend because they already had one, so I didn't try as hard. And I knew I would have to impress both people to be friends with even one of them. They usually come as a package deal. I have found it to be even more difficult in these situations as an adult.
Because of these past experiences, I have developed a strong opinion about labeling someone as a best friend. I think that the label can be a little bit dangerous. When we publicly label someone as a best friend, it can cause difficulties for either "best friend" to make as many new friends or to develop stronger friendships. And when we label someone as a best friend, even in our minds, we can limit our desires to develop more friendships.
So I guess it's not having the best friend that causes problems but the label. And labels of any kind can cause problems. We hear about the dangers of labeling people, but we don't often talk about the dangers of even good labels. I have a friend whose children always seem to behave perfectly. Everyone labels them as perfect, and because of that label, people don't expect her to ever have problems with her children. She doesn't receive the understanding that should be given to everyone, the understanding that nobody is perfect. (I don't have this problem because my kids are universally known to have their problems, fist fights during the calm Nativity scene, etc.)
We all need friends, and we need to feel like other people like us. We don't want to feel that the other person doesn't fully value us, that they will always have another person that they like more. And we don't want to limit ourselves. We want to keep ourselves open to new friendship opportunities......don't we? Am I the only person who feels this way?